A ridiculous story that is not really important to be told let alone imitated. But it’s okay if you just make fun and entertainment in the midst of the chaos of life that sometimes makes your head feel like it’s about to split. Well funny stories, can make the mind fresh again. Good luck.
You know you’re about to have another election. That means I’ve officially been single for five elections. I don’t know… I’m surprised and don’t understand myself, what other method should I use so that this singles curse ends soon.
“Ouch, Ma’am, what’s wrong with the legs?” Jabon asked worriedly.
“I sprained my leg, Mas,” replied the Mbak, groaning holding her leg. “Ughh… It hurts, Mas, it hurts so much…”
“Yes, Ma’am. Be patient, Ma’am…” Jabon tried to calm down, while helping to rub her feet. “Where’s your house, let me take you home…”
“Thank you, Mas. My house is in RT 1019.”
God damn it! In which area is RT 1019?
Next, Jabon took Mbak home. I had to go home in a coal truck.
Two weeks later, I read the news in the village hall wall, that Jabon has officially become the same Mbak he helped. Whoops! Jabon can really get a girlfriend.
“That’s why, Zuck. If you want to get a girl’s attention, you have to be willing to help her with anything,” Jabon showed off.
“Is that so, Bon?”
One other afternoon, I was walking around the village alone, and I happened to see a woman crying on the side of the road. I thought, this is my part.
“Which side of the leg is sprained, Ma’am. Let me massage it and then I’ll take you home,” I asked excitedly.
“I’m crying because my boyfriend just dumped me, you know!”
“Oh. How come you don’t sprain? Sprain please, please…”
I was disappointed that Mbak’s leg was okay.
“Don’t bother me, I want to be alone….” Mbak cried even more.
But I can’t give up. I have to be able to help this Mbak out of confusion.
“There’s no need to cry, Ma’am. It’s just this decision. You should be happy, because then you can get a more handsome replacement, like me.”
The mother looked at me with disdain. “Looking like a candidate’s sticker, how handsome is that?!”
“Hahaha. Ma’am is also like a candidate from the final party,” I joked dryly.
“We are like legislative candidates. I’m beautiful. It’s just like that!”
“But Ma’am, I love you, right?” slander me, with sosoan using English.
“GO TO HELL!!” replied the mother curtly.
“Hell is too far, Mbak. Better let’s go to my bed.”
Si Mbak glared at me, then raised her hands high with open palms. I don’t know what that means, whether you want to slap me or want to be chest-chest with the afternoon clouds.
But then the hand was lowered again, then used to stroke his chest while muttering: “Patience, patience….”
I remember Jabon’s aphorisms, ‘if you want to get a girl’s attention, you have to be willing to help her’.
“Yes, Ma’am. Be patient, Ma’am,” I comforted while rubbing her chest, trying to help relieve the tightness in her chest.
But I don’t think, let alone dinyana:
sob. Again, I failed to get a girlfriend, instead I got a slap!